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Grieving Patterns and Anticipatory Grief
Pennsylvania Accidental Death Claims
The impending loss of a loved one is not a vision anyone of us wants to wake up to. We don’t want to carry this heavy responsibility around knowing that soon the person we love won’t be here much longer. This emotion is called anticipatory grief which happens before an impending loss of life. It can happen to your loved one or it can happen to you.
You might find out that a belated diagnosis like mesothelioma cancer which takes decades to be diagnosed then has a short prognosis. You might discover that your or a loved one has been misdiagnosed or failed to be diagnosed as in medical malpractice. You may find out that a chronic illness has taken a turn for the worst.
Anticipatory grief can make you angry, depressed, anxious, and lethargic. You might also feel guilty about not spending enough time with your loved one or resentful because you are spending too much time with your loved one.
Here are some thoughts for how to cope with your new found knowledge of death and anticipatory grief:
Don’t run from grief. Don’t deny your feelings. Learn about anticipatory grief. Get help from a therapist or counselor. Talk to hospital social workers or hospice workers and ask for articles, DVDs, or audio tapes to learn from.
Be prepared and face reality. Decide in advance how you’re going to act with your loved one. Be a good listener. Don’t deny impending death to yourself, other family members, and to the loved one. By facing reality you have the opportunity to say goodbye which some people never have. If you ignore the truth and don’t say goodbye or don’t let others say goodbye, you have denied your loved one of meaningful relationships and will live with that guilt the rest of your life.
Build a support system. If you build it, they will not automatically come unless you pick up the phone and make the call. Put the list of family members and friends or neighbors on your cell phone and on your phone at home. Or schedule the simple but supportive acts of meeting for a cup of tea or going for a walk with your friend and his or her dog. Join a grief support group through your religious affiliation, community center, or hospital.
Make arrangements. Ask your loved one about special requests whether it be memorial services, hymns and songs. Now is the time to gather all necessary legal documents signed, sealed, and delivered and have on hand as needed.
Look forward. You will never stop loving your loved one but emotional pain does diminish over time. You might think about honoring your loved one’s life by donating to his or her favorite charity or by creating a quilt in their memory by collecting patches from family and friends celebrating his or her hobbies. You could also start a foundation, grant, or scholarship in their name.
If your loved one has a belated prognosis of mesothelioma cancer or a misdiagnosis of cancer or has already died, please contact Anapol Schwartz Pennsylvania law firm to find out what your legal options are for asbestos exposure cancer or misdiagnosis medical malpractice.
